I Watched This Game: Canucks at Sharks, January 03, 2011

Canucks 4 - 3 Sharks

The Canucks came into San Jose to play their third road game in four nights. Unbeaten in five, and expected to be dog-tired, there was a sense among Canuck nation that a loss to San Jose was as inevitable as the extraplanar robots that chase down lawbreakers. The Sharks came into this game fourth in the Western Conference, and with their continued employment of Joe Thornton, Dany Heatley, and Dan Boyle, looked to be formidable foes.

They were formidable foes. That said, they still got beat by a Canucks team that has seemingly forgotten how to lose. As a born loser, I'm here if they need the help, but I don't think they'll call. In the meantime, I guess Daniel and I will just have to sit around watching them win, like we did tonight when we watched this game:

• The Second Law of Sedinery: if the Sedins find themselves alone behind the defense, you may as well go line up at center ice. They will score. The opening goal (above), off a turnover by Joe Thornton (and not Jason Demers, as crazy old John Garrett insisted), is a classic case of Wizardous Sedinerie. Antti Niemi made a common mistake and got Daniel confused with Henrik. Had he realized that Henrik had the first touch, he might have realized Daniel was about to get the second. Instead, he anticipated a shot from Henrik Sedin. Rookie mistake. Also a rookie mistake? Letting Gary Busey date your mom.

• Speaking of Rookie of the Year, let's talk about casts. The second-line featured a rotating one, as Jannik Hansen, Jeff Tambellini, and Mason Raymond all saw time as Ryan Kesler's wings. When Tambellini and Raymond were together, they showed the potential to be the fastest duo since Northstar and Aurora. (Other similarities: both duos are Canadian, and spend an inordinate amount of time in dark blue. Differences: Raymond's not gay, and Tambellini's not a woman.) Anyway, Raymond and Hansen finished the night on that line, and Hansen may have re-won his spot there with this game-tying goal late in the second period. Early in the season, I grumbled about Hansen spending time on the second line--the old Jannik finished his checks but not his scoring chances. That said, like a piece of furniture haunted by the ghost of a carpenter, Hansen has magically developed finish. #WorstAnalogyAward

• What was going on during the Canucks second goal? Ehrhoff and Edler apparently switched places with Daniel and Henrik, briefly becoming the forwards on the rush. They didn't do too badly, either. Perhaps Edler felt slighted when Skeeter suggested he didn't have the stuff to play center, or perhaps the Sedins felt pigeonholed as offensive wizards and wanted a chance to play defense. Third option: the Sedins forgot that the teams switched ends for the second, and were thrilled about being in behind the defense for a second time.

• Tanner Glass played 8:25 tonight, which is about on par with his usual minutes, except that he spent ten minutes in the box for two fights (a full one-sixth of the game). The fourth line in general was noticeable tonight, spending a lot of time in the offensive zone. Chalk this up to the return of Mason Raymond, which has banished a top-nine player to the bottom three. And, while the line may not have seen an increase in minutes, they saw a definite increase in third period minutes, as Alain Vigneault trusted them with late shifts in a close game.

• Part of this might have been a desire to play fresh guys on the back-to-back games, but another part might have been that Alex Bolduc was winning faceoffs when Henrik Sedin and Ryan Kesler weren't. For the third straight game, the Canucks lost the faceoff battle, although this time by a very narrow margin. Manny Malhotra was his usual stalwart self, winning 14-of-18, including all six in the defensive zone. Just Manny being Manny. The other two big drawmen were kind of crummy. Kind of really crummy. Kesler was 35% in the circle. Henrik was 27%.

• Continuing the negativity, on San Jose's first goal, Rome needs to cover Clowe in front of the net, not the random patch of ice to Schneider's left, which he so ably defended. On San Jose's second goal, Henrik needs to not be in the box. Captain Hook strikes again. On San Jose's third goal, Schneider needs to remove all banana peels from his crease prior to the start of the period. Open letter to Rollie Melanson: get on that.

• Christian Ehrhoff was good tonight. He facilitated breakouts like working at McDonald's, had 5 shots, blocked 4, and picked up two assists. I've heard fans saying that, now that Bieksa's playing well, we should trade Ehrhoff instead. Tonight, Ehrhoff showed San Jose why they never should have let him go; let's not wish that same regret upon ourselves.
  

• Like Evangeline Lilly in a Live Links commercial, Mason Raymond draws a lot of calls. It's good to see him buzzing around the offensive zone, falling down like Cory Schneider.

• Not to rag on Cory Schneider too much. Despite his shaky moments, such as collapsing like a Jenga tower in a rowboat, he made some incredible saves, and also let in less goals than Antti Niemi. These are both positives. The Canucks are now 7-0-2 when Schneider starts.

• Worst outfit of the night goes to Dan Murphy, who wore an ugly tie that looked like it was made of dried beef broth. Someone needs to get him on What Not to Wear immediately. Seriously, where did he get it? The toilet store?

• Observation: every time the puck goes over the glass, pro hockey players become children stargazing with their fathers. They point with such enthusiasm it's embarrassing. Look, Dad, a shooting star! Didja see it? Didja?
  
• Word was Kesler might sit this one out after taking a shot to the foot in the game prior, but he wound up playing twenty-three very effective minutes. He put up four shots, as well as attempting another six, one of which hit the crossbar after a beautiful tip.
  

• Speaking of shots, the Canucks put up 47 and attempted 70. They peppered Niemi like a flavourless steak. A ton of those shots ended up in Niemi's glove, which the Canucks apparently hate as much as the shooter in The Jerk hates oil cans. The Canucks won the last game against the Sharks with considerable hittiness, but tonight, shootiness was their primary asset.

• And finally, let's give major credit to Alex Burrows, who took it upon himself to win da turd by scoring the game-winner halfway into da turd. The refs reviewed it for something that isn't reviewable but, since many officials still sort of hate Burr for that thing that happened, it makes sense.
  

An Open Challenge to Tanner Glass, and Other NHL Scrabblers

Last week, in an interview on the Team 1040, Canucks winger Tanner Glass disclosed that he and teammate Aaron Rome often play Scrabble on team flights. This stunning revelation immediately grabbed me. Unfortunately, nobody else cared. Scrabble is a niche game. Either you love it, or you hate it, and to love it, you have to be a wordplay sort of guy. Guys like this are few and far between, namely because they die young, their survival skills sorely lacking.

I am that sort of guy. I love Scrabble. In fact, I hereby issue an open challenge to Tanner Glass: let's scrabble. You and me, pal. I will throw down on you like you're a triple-word score. Your scrabble is wack. My scrabble is the radness. You think you can handle my scrabble? Then scrabble me, Tanner.

And now we wait. In the meantime, I did some research and asked around, looking for other NHL personalities who dabble in the scrabble. Coming up, 20 NHL personalities who have a weakness for the world's greatest crossword-building game.

1. Alex Burrows scrabbles, but often complains that, because English is his second language, he's at a disadvantage. Teammates say, though they usually allow him to make words in English and French, he never makes any sense in either. Another source claimed Alex Burrows spells words with way more O's than they need.
2. Ilya Kovalchuk scrabbles. Even when he can't make a move, he won't pass.
3. Brian Burke scrabbles, but a source claims he only wins games by adding suffixes onto other people's words, and that he can't build a decent word from scratch. He has a tendency to save his tiles for big words like tenacity and pugnacious. Worse, he once traded both blank tiles for a Q, a letter that gets a lot of points, but needs complementary letters or it's useless.
4. Marc Savard scrabbles, but he has a reputation for trying to pass off completely made-up words. An anonymous source within the league called him "a little fake artist."
5. Matt Cooke scrabbles, but he only spells words like poop, and butt, and boob. He has a reputation as a dirty player.
6. Tampa Bay coach Guy Boucher scrabbles. An anonymous junior coach said he plays too defensively by clogging up the board, and ruins the fun of it.
7. Darryl Sutter scrabbles, but he doesn't manage his tiles very well. Inexplicably, he often changes them for weaker ones and he never quite seems to know what letters he needs.
8. Wayne Gretzky scrabbles, but he doesn't seem to know what he's doing and he never seems to have a plan. Word has it he's better at table hockey. A former player said he once quit in the middle of a scrabble game, and the guy that came in to replace him turned things around in a hurry.
9. Chris Pronger scrabbles, but nobody likes to play him because he has a reputation for stealing your tiles right off your rack. And stomping on your leg if he loses.
10. Charles Wang scrabbles, and when he gets a letter he likes, he locks it up for fifteen years.
11. Colin Campbell scrabbles, but he refuses to play Sorry.
12. Patrick Kane scrabbles so often he might have a serious problem. While celebrating his Stanley Cup win, Deadspin once called him "more Scrabble than man," but the headline was changed to something else just to make him sound cooler.
13. Don Cherry scrabbles. He'd be really good if he didn't have a tendency to invert important letters in every word.
14. The Sedins scrabble, but only together, and they spend the whole game setting each other up for double-word scores.
15. Derek Boogaard scrabbles, or at least he thinks it's scrabble. He spends the whole game punching the board, and most people refuse to play him.
16. Mark Messier scrabbles, and some say he's one of the best to play the game. But I spoke to the Vancouver Scrabble Club, and they claim he was the worst player they ever had.
17. George Parros scrabbles. He's amazing at it.
18. Sean Avery scrabbles, but former opponents claim he spends most of the game waving a ruler in their faces to distract them.
19. Sami Salo used to scrabble, but he once tore his MCL digging into the velvet bag. Team doctors have asked him to avoid board games altogether.
20. Glen Sather scrabbles. People close to him say he stocks up on high-scoring consonants and spends little time surrounding them with vowels.

I Watched This Game: Canucks at Avalanche, November 04, 2010

Canucks 3 - 1 Avalanche

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say last night's game was the Canucks' most complete effort of the season. The first period alone was perhaps the best road period the Canucks have played in quite some time, as they dictated the play, kept the pressure on while they rolled their lines, opened the scoring (above), won a fight, generated numerous chances, and limited the pressure in their own zone. Concerns about letdowns in the second and third period prove to be unfounded as well, as the Canucks kept up their high level of play--with only the occasional gaffe--all game long. It was highly entertaining, and I am proud to say that I watched this game.

• It was quite nice to see Ryan Kesler find his sweet spot on the power play and net the opening goal. He was the best player on the ice tonight, and it's not often you can say about about the Kesler who travels. His woes on the road are as storied as Wile E. Coyote's. Has he turned a corner? Hopefully. I hypothesize that, if he has, it's because he has a blanket he takes with him everywhere, and it makes every bed feel like his bed. That's always worked for me. That and having my Mom there to tuck me in, no matter where I am. Tousle my hair, Mom. Ha ha, delightful.
  
  
• Considering the proficiency of the Canucks' special teams this season, I'm working on keeping my mouth shut about the removal of Kesler from the second unit. It's a lot easier to do when he scores on the first unit, and the second unit scores later without him. Apart from small lulls, Canucks' special teams have been excellent this season. The Henrik Sedin goal was a prime example. That was some grade-A puck movement. Also grade-A? The paper I'm currently writing on the similarities between the Marxist and Thomist dismissals of justice as a primary virtue and their Aristotelian influence. I am so smart.
  
  
• It's funny, because I thought Henrik and Daniel had a pretty quiet game. When the 60 minutes was over, however, Henrik had the game-winner and Daniel had two assists. His pass to Kesler for the first goal was spectacular.
  
  
• Raffi Torres continues to be a masterful tipper. He's tippier than a game of Jenga played in a canoe. He had four shots tonight, and looks to be brimming with confidence. Seven goals in 12 games will do that to you.
  
  
• I know all three Canucks goals were scored on the powerplay, but, again, we got one goal from each of our top three lines. That is excellent, balanced production.
  
  
• Mason Raymond was incredible tonight. 5 shots, and a ton of quality chances. He didn't score, but he looked fantastic, like going clubbing in an argyle sweater vest.
  
  
• Somebody needs to tell Andrew Alberts that, while the Canucks might have confidence in him carrying the puck up ice, other teams don't. Tonight, just like in the last game, he was the perpetrator of a brutal turnover in the defensive zone that could have been avoided if he'd moved the puck up-ice quickly. Instead, he flaunted his newly spawned self-confidence and held onto it. The Avs got a prime scoring chance. Yes, you're big, so you're quite difficult to knock off the puck, but you're also pretty easy to hit, because you're big. Andrew: move the puck faster.
  
  
• That said, my favorite part of that broken play was when Garrett tried to blame it on Kevin Bieksa. Don't try to ingratiate yourself to me, John Garrett. Anyway, Kevin Bieksa was good tonight. At times I found myself liking his game. I am suddenly aware that this is happening with an alarming frequency. I'm concerned he might be good. What is happening to me?
  
  
• Alex Edler continues to be a rock on defense, but I expect his game to really flourish when Dan Hamhuis comes back. Edler should be able to join the rush a little more and show a little more creativity when he knows Hamhuis is behind him. Christian Ehrhoff is not Dan Hamhuis. Sometimes, watching his and Edler's confusion over who will jump into the rush is akin to watching two guys try to go through a door at the same time.
  
  
• Guillaume Desbiens broke his hand in a fight, and I have two thoughts. My first thought: this happens a lot. Don't you think guys would realize that punching a helmet as hard as you can is a good way to break your hand? I feel like it's obvious. Anyway, my second thought regarding Desbiens' broken hand: meh.
  
  
• Mikael Samuelsson is still drifting through games like some kind of zombie. (Okay, that's an overstatement, but I wanted to link to my favourite Christian rock song ever.) Anyway, he's having trouble finding a rhythm. My advice: relax, Sammy. Eventually, the rhythm is gonna get you.
  
  
• And finally, Cory Schneider is going to be so easy to trade. He was fantastic tonight. 33 saves, one goal allowed. He made it look easy, but this game was anything but. The Avalanche can create offense, and while they may not have had a ton of quality scoring chances, they had some excellent shots from good scoring areas. Schneider was one step ahead of them all night, getting square, taking away the net, and swallowing up the puck. There is still no goaltending controversy. The Canucks simply have two delicious options, like going to a Tim Horton's that is also a Wendy's.