Injury to Malhotra Gives the Canucks Someone to "Do it For"

Yesterday, we learned that the Canucks will be without Manny Malhotra for the rest of the season due to eye injury. It was difficult to digest, and not just because Malhotra is a fantastic human being who doesn't deserve this terrible misfortune. Also, because Malhotra has been an invaluable member of the Canucks forward corps this season, and his contributions are irreplaceable. Since joining the team in the offseason, Manny has enlivened Vancouver's faceoff percentage, given their third line a cohesive identity, allowed the Canucks' offensive superstars to focus on scoring, and even reversed the Canucks' bad luck with bald players (after such winners as Eric Weinrich and Jan Bulis). Malhotra has done a lot, and his absence will be impossible not to feel.

But this doesn't mean the Canucks can't win without him, because they can. In fact, it's likely that they will win because of this unfortunate incident. I say this not to be insensitive or flippant, but because I've watched a lot of sports movies, and if there's one thing I know for sure, it's that no team can win the championship until a role player goes down with an injury, thereby giving the team somebody to do it for.

It's a staple of sports films:

When everything seems to be going perfectly for the protagonist(s), one of the team members or supporting characters gets injured, providing an emotional roadblock that eventually becomes even further motivation to win.

The examples are endless: Gerry Bertier in Remember the Titans. Chet "Rocket" Steadman in Rookie of the Year. Adam Banks in Mighty Ducks: 2. James "Boobie" Miles in Friday Night Lights. Kelvin Owens in Gridiron Gang. Walter Cochran in The Replacements. Apollo Creed in Rocky IV. Carver in the woefully underrated Bring it On.

As far as I'm concerned, Malhotra's untimely injury basically guarantees us the title, by virtue of the precedent set in the movies I've watched. And ignore the so-called "critics" who would dismiss my optimism by calling this sports movie trope a "cliche," just because it's in a lot of movies. If you're unconvinced, your beef is with history; most of these movies are based on true stories (especially Mighty Ducks 2, which is very realistic--Iceland is a notorious hockey powerhouse).

Alain Vigneault said as much: "I think, to some extent, this could be a good rallying point for the guys." Good is an understatement. Crucial is more like it. No word on whether the entire team will shave their heads in solidarity. If they don't, from where I'm sitting, they're wasting a bonding opportunity. Imagine it: bald heads, playoff beards... it'd be a whole team of Shel Silversteins. Have you ever read The Giving Tree with a loved one? It's an emotional roller coaster. Shel Silverstein brings people together.

The evidence is incontrovertible. Manny Malhotra, consummate leader that he is, has gone down for the season to give the team that final piece of motivation and unity. He may not be on the starting roster, but Manny Malhotra is our angel in the outfield.




Disclaimer: I wish it went without saying, but this post is satire. In truth, Malhotra's injury is much bigger than hockey, he is in our prayers, and we wish him a speedy and complete recovery.

This Sucks

Manny Malhotra is done for the season and playoffs. I am just devastated right now. There are no words. If you want to know how important I think Malhotra is to the Canucks' success, read "Manny Malhotra is an Enabler." Right now I'll busy myself by building a massive panic button.

I Watched This Game: Canucks at Blues, February 14, 2011

Canucks 2 - 3 Blues

There are many possible explanations for the wave of mutilation that has befallen our defense corps, and they all involve the unspeakable. This ain't no worldly happening, y'all. This is a straight up X-file. Here are some theories: Sami Salo's lifelong injury demon is the most powerful Hellspawn since Dakota Fanning; Dave Nonis is a voodoo champion (Cam Cole's expert theory), Rick Bowness is suffering the ill effects of a gypsy curse; while watching video on hip checking technique, skills coach Glenn Carnegie accidentally played the team a haunted video tape; Kevin Bieksa had a premonition and recently prevented the entire Canucks' defense group from boarding a plane that crashes, and now death has a list; or maybe, the hockey gods are trying to humble us. Guys, I have to know. Not so much out of concern for the Canucks, mind you, but because nobody knows what sort of evil we're dealing with here, and therefore, nobody knows how transferable this curse actually is. Am I next? After all, I watched this game:

• Forced humility by way of the hockey gods seems a likely explanation. Last night's loss to the St. Louis Blues was exactly the sort of loss that might have sent Canuck nation into a tizzy in previous years. The Canucks were sorely outhit, outshot, and outplayed, and a severe puck misplay by Roberto Luongo wound up being the difference-maker. Normally, this would be time to trot out the usual gripes about team toughness and overrated Italians. But, when it's your goaltender's first regulation loss in twenty games, and when your team remains a trillion points ahead of the rest of the Conference, it's hard not to shrug at the occasional whoopsie. I mean, the Canucks are 1-2 in their last three. Is that reason enough for panic? No, not really, all things considered, but such rationality flies in the face of regular Vancouver fan protocol. It's possible that the hockey gods are attempting to exacerbate each loss by tacking on a long-term injury to a defenceman, simply so that we will treat the defeat with our usual austerity. This is all our fault. Canuck fans: for all our sakes, please panic like you used to.

• If you're not sure what I'm on about with all this, let's catch you up to speed: in the second period of last night's game, Andrew Alberts broke his freaking wrist. He joins an injury list that includes: everyone ever. Everybody hurts.

• Unfortunately, the injuries on the back end are beginning to show. Give Chris Tanev credit for going eleven NHL games before people realized he had only played eleven games in the NHL.
  

• One of the best things about all these injuries has been the certain ensuing article about how it opens up cap space. That's like saying the accidental death of a plane crash survivor means more food for the remaining stranded, now forced to eat him.
  

• Roberto Luongo deserves a ton of credit for his remarkable streak, bookended, strangely enough, by losses to the St. Louis Blues. Don't act so surprised: compared to battling depression, it's easy to overcome wild animal attacks and natural disasters. Sometimes there's simply no cure for the blues.

• It's a shame it had to end the way it did, though. I was just going to write an article about how Luongo's puck-handling skills had improved. Suffice it to say, such an article is no longer relevant, as Luongo picked up an assist on Alex Steen's goal when he made a perfect feed to Steen while concurrently vacating the net. That's the opposite of what you're supposed to do. That gaffe aside, however, Luongo was sensational last night, making 31 saves--several of the phylum "Hoo boy, wacky!"--to keep things close, including one toe save that prompted a John Garrett swoon over Luongo's freakishly long legs.

• It's also a shame that the Canucks' loss and injury party overshadowed the kiss from a rose that was a rare goal by the third line (above). After some impressive sustained offensive zone pressure by the reunited trio of Hansen, Malhotra, and Torres, Jannik Hansen was able to shock the world by putting in a rebound. Several people tweeted "Good shift by Torres." the rarest sentence in the English language, rarer even, than the 1287-word sentence in William Faulkner's Absalom, Absalom! Torres didn't look too bad last night. Here's hoping he's beginning to trend upwards.
  

• I remain unconvinced the Canucks can't keep both Bieksa and Ehrhoff somehow, but if you're wondering which of the two should be kept, consider that Ehrhoff has looked a little shaky without Edler, while Bieksa, even without Hamhuis, remains the best breakup artist since Dashboard Confessional. On one rush, Bieksa hurried back to turn a 2-on-1 into a 2-on-2, then somehow put himself in perfect position to break up a saucer pass to the trailer. It was sort of amazing. Anyway, Christian Ehrhoff still finished as the high-minute man, logging an obscene 29:16, but Bieksa probably would have eclipsed thirty, had he not spent four minutes in the penalty box.

• Speaking of the penalty box, I didn't particularly care for the reffing in last night's game. They called some stuff they shouldn't have (Kevin Bieksa's slash) and they missed a bunch of blatant calls (like a handful of holds on the Sedins, or Samuelsson's dangerous crosscheck). That's not why the Canucks lost, though, so we'll move on.

• The Canucks' first goal was yet another instance where one Sedin picked up a point while the other didn't. This has happened a lot this season. Daniel remains five points up on his brother, which is just strange to me. Is this evidence of a rift? I say yes. We all know Daniel Sedin is out for blood and often imagines strangling his brother to death. Rumour has it, every night, in the Sedins' shared dreamspace, Daniel tries to use inception to convince Henrik he should retire, and Henrik is sick of it.

• Manny Malhotra won most of his faceoffs again, going 12-for-16. Of note: he went 9-for-12 in the defensive zone, 3-for-4 in the neutral zone, and 0-for-0 in the offensive zone. Again, that's 16 faceoffs, none inside the opponent's blue line. I hate to say Skeeter was right (I really do), so I won't. But let it remain implied. Malhotra spends less time in the offensive zone than the Jonas Brothers.
  

• The game-tying goal that was waved off in the dying seconds of the game was probably right not to count. While Kevin Bieksa's ability to move an entire pile of adult men with one superman punch is impressive, it seems kind of against the rules. But if Jannik Hansen ever needs him to punch Team Rocket into space, it's good to know it'll be a piece of cake for him.

• And finally: Victor Oreskovich needs to finish the night with more than one hit, especially on a night when the Blues outhit the Canucks by a margin of 2-to-1.

Slewfoot on Keith Ballard Showcases One of the Many Ways a Player Can Needlessly Injure Another Player

If you haven't seen it yet, here's a clip of the Keith Ballard injury, via Kukla's Korner. Last night, during the game, I wondered aloud to my wife if Milan Michalek was guilty of a slewfoot here. Kukla's Korner asks the same question. Ben Kuzma also asked. Mike Gillis straight up said it was. Let me tell you: if it looks like a slewfoot and quacks like a duck, well, it's probably a slewfoot, but then why the Hell is it quacking?

Anyway, this is probably a slewfoot, one of the many oft-overlooked ways one player can give another player a completely needless, totally avoidable, longterm injury. Word is Ballard will miss 2-4 weeks with an MCL sprain, and if the MRI reveals a tear, well, longer. Frankly, Hips is lucky his knee didn't pop clean off--the fate that befell my poseable MC Hammer action figure when I was nine.

And if it is a slewfoot, where's the outrage? I don't like the way this is being brushed off. Slewfoots are exceedingly dangerous, just like the headshots that dominate the daily discussions of NHL issues. They happen surprisingly often, and yet nobody really talks about cracking down on them.

Today would have been a great day to discuss yet one more way hockey players aren't showing each other enough respect on the ice, one more dirty play on which the league needs to crack down. But instead, when I turned on the radio, I was dropped into yet another rant about headshots. Let's get serious, radio guys. You had a major slewfoot in your market and you go right back to the well of overplayed topics? Granted, Cam Cole's article on headshots and the Code is brilliant and worth discussing, but if the above video tells me anything, it's that headshots aren't the only way to shorten a guy's career, and the others deserve some discussion as well.

Highlights From Sami Salo's Two-Goal Debut in Manitoba

Canuck fans have every right to temper their expectations about Sami Salo's return to the lineup this season. The guy attracts injuries like banana-eaters attract mosquitoes, and his most recent near-mortal wound in a game of floorball (a.k.a. hockey so thoroughly neutered it can be played on gym floors without fear of scuffing) was a sort of last straw for many. Moreover, even if you're optimistic that Salo can remain healthy once healthy, you'd have to think that he couldn't possibly get back to the level at which he operates when healthy. A torn Achilles tendon is a Hell of a thing to rehabilitate.

Sami Salo appears to be aware of your concerns. Down in the AHL on a conditioning assignment, Casper scored two goals in his first game with the Manitoba Moose. Take that, haters. If you were finding it difficult to muster Salo-based excitement, have a gander at the above video. Salo's goals come 0:43 and 2:48 into the clip, and it's evident that his game hasn't changed. Both goals are typically saloesque: one is a backdoor play and the other a howitzer. The only major difference is that he's wearing 22, but honestly, if you know anything about Sami Salo's game, you'd recognize him if he were dressed as Shrek.

Jeff Tambellini recently told Justin Bourne that Salo would soon step in to replace Edler without the Canucks missing a beat. We wondered if this was insider information. Now, with Salo needing about a millisecond to show he's too good for the AHL, it appears that it was. Rumour has it Salo could be back in the lineup as early as next Saturday, and this video is evidence we should be at least a little bit excited about that.

Ryan Kesler Would Literally Play on Crutches

Every so often, we hear reports of a Ryan Kesler injury. It doesn't matter what it is--a sore hand, a sore foot, a broken bone in either--regardless of the injury's placement or severity, each article of this sort inevitably contains the sentence "Kesler will play."

The latest of these articles comes from the Province's Ben Kuzma, who reports on a sore thumb that caused Kesler to miss today's practice for what Alain Vigneault routinely and hilariously calls "maintenance." I take maintenance to mean "gruesome injury recovery" and my guess is Vigneault's players do as well. Here's Vigneault on the injury:

"He hurt his thumb a bit and it's just a little bit sore. Faceoffs in the neutral zone, he was letting Jeff Tambellini take them [Saturday], but in our zone he was taking them. So he should be fine."

We observed, in the Saturday's IWTG, that Kesler took less faceoffs than usual. Turns out he was playing through an injury. Should have known.

But see, Kesler might be too hurt to take a few faceoffs. Whatever. He's never too hurt to play. For Kesler, there's hardly any such condition. There are few situations in which he would allow himself to miss a game, and all would require at least 2 of the following 3 obstacles: 1) The tearful begging of loved ones 2) Legal writ 3) the teeth of a rusty bear trap.

Kesler doesn't miss games. Recall seven days ago when it was reported Kesler was limping badly after a shot to the ankle and might miss the following day's game against the Sharks. Fat chance of that. Kesler played over twenty-two minutes, pushing his consecutive games played streak to 202. It's now at 205.

Recall, after Sami Salo's testicle was nearly exploded by a puck, Kesler's amusing observation that he couldn't imagine a worse injury to play through.

We at PITB have observed in the past that Ryan Kesler takes hockey very, very seriously. Hilariously seriously. Kyle Wellwood once remarked that he couldn't imagine taking hockey that seriously (although I'm sure Kesler would say the exact opposite of Wellwood).

But seriously, how seriously? So seriously he'd lop off a finger to play a playoff game. Let's go back three years. Brad Zeimer:

It is helpful to consider the three words Kesler uttered to the team's training staff when he realized a shattered left index finger was going to end his comeback at a single game.

"Cut it off," an emotional Kesler told them.

Thankfully, they did not listen.

Granted, Kesler was only a foolish 23 at the time, but when I was twenty-three, I believed very strongly in keeping my fingers. Not Kesler, and he was dead serious about losing the digit. "I really wanted to play," he said later, defending his utter insanity. "To look back, it was a pretty stupid thing to say."

Yes, it was. But Ryan Kesler is crazy. While Jim Robson once hyperbolized that Trevor Linden would play on crutches, Ryan Kesler actually would. Or, if one of his legs was broken, he'd advise the doctors to take the other one and install a wheel. Kesler would turn himself into Rosie, the Jetsons' maid, to play. Kesler would cut his arm off with a hacksaw and cauterize the wound on a hot stove to play (in which case, so much for the bear trap joke).

Again, Ryan Kesler is crazy.

The Dreaded Two-Goal Lead: Cody Hodgson Broke His Face

Canucks news comes fast and furious, and sometimes we find ourselves playing catchup. Thankfully, the Dreaded Two Goal Lead--often called "the worst lead in hockey"--is super easy to come back from. Everybody knows it's a guaranteed death sentence for those that hold it. Well, much like an ice hockey team coming from two goals down, PITB will now effortlessly catch up.

• Cody Hodgson Breaks His Face

Another day, another reason to panic about Canucks' top prospect Cody Hodgson. Fresh off a string of positive results and reports, the young center's luck took another negative turn when he took a high stick to the face in practice. Things got even worse when it turned out he had a chip and a crack in his orbital bone. And, since it wouldn't be a Cody Hodgson story without a smattering of uncertainty and a vast array of conflicting reports, nobody's sure whether he'll be undergoing a facial surgery that would keep him out long-term or hoping it heals naturally so that he can return to the lineup in two weeks or so, in full face-shield. Word is he's going for the non-surgery option, but if it doesn't heal properly, he'll have to undergo the surgery anyhow, just two weeks delayed. It's complicated. Once again, the situation required a specialist's opinion. Tip to aspiring specialists: befriend Cody Hodgson. He'll call a lot.

• Canucks sign Darren Archibald

You've probably never heard of Darren Archibald, and that's because, like John Wayne, he was never drafted. Archibald's potential probably tops out as a third-line winger, but any time the Canucks get a guy with NHL potential for free, it's tough to complain. Not impossible. Just tough. Archibald, a 20-year-old from Newmarket, Ontario, is a 6'3", 195 lb. left winger with his own Hockey Fights page, so you know he's got power forward potential. He's also got 51 goals and 57 assists in 125 games with the OHL's Barrie Colts, so you know he can score a little. Word is that he's a "complete player," which is nice, although that term can also be a nice way to say he isn't particularly good at anything.

We're still waiting for one of Gillis's under-the-radar signings to really pay off, but you can't argue with his Eye of Sauron approach to building the prospect pool. He'll take a potential NHLer from anywhere. But it's also worth noting that the Canucks weren't Archibald's only suitor (Archibalds always have more than one suitor). He chose to come to Vancouver. That's a regular story these days.

• Jordan Schroeder Got Hurt Also

Yes, lost in the terror that is Cody Hodgson's latest intriguing ailment was Jordan Schroeder also suffering an injury, after an opponent fell on his ankle 6:47 into the second. He was seen on crutches after the game. The good news? The Canucks' medical staff had crutches on hand (sometimes they're tough to track down when you need them). Things don't appear to be too serious for Schroeder, although he's missed a couple games now and figures to miss a few more. A full report on his injury hasn't been issued yet.

Before Canuck fans panic too much, let's recall that we have other prospects who aren't in the sick bay. In fact, lost in the shuffle of all this doom and gloom is the positive news that Billy Sweatt has actually passed Cody Hodgson in team scoring, and now sits one point behind Sergei Shirokov for the team lead.

• Canucks Waive Guillaume Desbiens

That said, the farm is down a few forwards. To help the cause, the Canucks have tried to get big right-winger Guillaume Desbiens through waivers. That said, you have to wonder when and if Desbiens will be back in a Canucks uniform this season. As fourth-line grit goes, he had a bit of a fail when he forgot how to punch, and he didn't accomplish much else while he was here. He's been good to go for a few games but hasn't gotten a start. You have to wonder if the Canucks would risk losing him for nothing if they weren't more okay with the possibility now than at the start of the season.

It's interesting that Desbiens has been healthy, but couldn't get back into the lineup, especially in place of call-up Jonas Andersson. Andersson doesn't require waivers to be sent down, but the Canucks were willing to take their chances with Desbiens. Don't look now, but Jonas Andersson may have quietly won Desbiens' job.